I love the alarmed tone of the cat meows when I’m home much later than usual. It sounds like “did you know?? Did you know it is late at night?! Hey! Hey! Did you know that there has not been dinner?! No dinner for cats? Hey! I can tell you are as concerned and worried about these developments as we are. My brother and I are also very concerned. No dinner!! The cats have not had dinner! Hey! Heeey!! Should you maybe call a police or pope or something? Congress? Dolly Parton? Did you know about this?”
being an adult is just saying to yourself “this is the weekend i’ll clean my [x]” and then proceeding to not do that because it’s the weekend and you deserve to relax, goddamnit
Leverage had a lot of well-researched things to say about the real world, but the one I always come back to, from The Double Blind Job:
Sophie: These are not small fines. Last year, my department handled a case where the company had to pay out $2.5 billion.
Hoffman:
Oh, yeah. Everybody heard about that. But what the news didn’t tell you
is that that company made $16 billion on the same drug. That fine was
14% of the profit. 14%. That’s like tipping your waiter.
In an interesting turn of events I have been enrolled in a six hour couples bondage seminar despite being both 1. painfully single and 2. Incredibly anxious but fuck it we ball, I guess
I thought "Excellent, I've been looking for more formal training in this area" so I signed up and then twenty minutes later the hamster running the wheel that powers my brain woke up and I went "ah shit, I need a date for this don't I"
You can choke someone unconscious in just 15 seconds. Temporary or permanent brain damage can then occur within 30 seconds. After 3 minutes, the brain will shut down and they will die.
And yet, plenty of people think getting choked in bed is sexy, and will attempt it without any research whatsoever.
Did you know that using binding materials that are too thin can cause lacerations? Or that tying someone in the wrong position can kill them? Did you know that just surface pressure held too long, without any struggling or pulling, can feel like a bone-deep bruise? Or alternatively, that too much slack or movement can strip skin right off, and you might not even feel it happening?
Sitting in a big room writing down notes and following an instructor really isn't all that sexy for me personally, true, but a lot of kink comes with risk, and making the concious choice to engage in kink without taking steps to minimize that risk is, frankly, dangerous and irresponsible.
Like.... every sky diving attendant probably had to pass a few exams before jumping out a plane with you, right? So wouldn't you feel a little unsafe jumping with one that was just making it up as they went?
mansplaining is a very specific phenomonon wherein a man who is NOT qualified to talk about a topic assumed he knows better than other people who ARE qualified, purely because of sexism.
sharing a fun fact you learned isnt mansplaining. infodumping isnt mansplaining. adding your relevant personal experience to a discussion isn’t mansplaining, (as long as you remain respectful of others’ experiences as well, but that’s always true). correcting someone who is objectively wrong and spreading misinformation REALLY isn’t mansplaining.
stop telling men that all of their interests and attempts at socializing are insulting and unwanted, your gender essentialism is showing.
people in my REAL LIFE i have had to convince i like to hear them talk, really:
trans men talking about their oppression
trans women talking about their oppression
autistic men infodumping
perfectly kind cis men who are answering a question i literally asked, or getting passionate about one of their interests
people who AREN’T self-conscious about this:
men who actually fucking mansplain, oh my god the whole POINT is that they dont care about other people’s thoughts, why do you think whatever this fucking campaign is would bother them
this is making the rounds again and the amount of people in the notes accusing me of being a man is hilarious. like no i just dont like being mean to people and alienating my friends, sorry.
theres too many pokemon games where you play as a kid whos full of life and full of potential. there needs to be a pokemon game where you play as a college dropout who lives in a shitty apartment
your starter pokemon are trubbish, rattata and glameow. which symbolise the trash you keep forgetting to take out, the rats living in your walls and the stray cat you keep trying to befriend but it keeps hissing at you.
you guys dont get it its not supposed to be dark and edgy its supposed to be living in a mundane setting and slowly rediscovering the wonder in the world by going on a journey with a magical trash bag that is your friend, its about love and recovery and coping with the stress of your adult life with your friend who is made of sentient garbage